But even as I type this now, I find myself wishing I were sleeping rather than typing. So, Im afraid this post might be rather lacking in the creative/thoughtful department. I apologize. :)
Baby spent several days teasing us. We'd think, for sure, she was coming ... and she never did on her own. So we tried taking things into our own hands. Here's how we try to induce labor in Montana: waterslides & four wheelers.
Of course, none of it worked & I ended up being induced on the 23rd. I'm cool with that tho --- as it turned out, the three of us ended up making some pretty special memories together. Our last memories as a family of 3. Maybe it seems indulgent to have spent so much time focusing on/mourning the 'family of 3' thing ... but I don't care. It felt like the right thing to do & I know it meant the world to Isaac. After our fourwheeler adventure I tucked him in that night. I asked, "Do you think I'm dorky for wanting to spend so much time with you this last week." He said, "Yea mom ... I do. But it was kind of great."
I'll take that. :)
Isaac spent the night with a dear family friend the night before the induction. When we dropped him off that night I felt sad .... We were going to go through something that was going to change our family forever. I felt like he should have been with us for that. He, on the other hand, was totally psyched to spend the night with a house full of women who spoil him rotten. In hindsight, it was the best place for him to be. :)
The long and the short of the delivery day goes like this:
I was on cloud nine when we were checking into the hospital. I felt excited --- we were going to meet our little human! They showed us to our room & told me to change into a gown. I went into the bathroom & was totally taken by surprise by a wave of sadness and uncontrollable tears. As I undressed I kept thinking, "This is the last time I'll wear this t-shirt." It seems stupid, I'm sure --- but I really loved my pregnant belly. Yea, sure, sometimes it was hard to feel beautifl when I was exhausted or had just popped a button off my jacket. But for the most part, I felt great. I felt pretty when Josh paid attention to it - talked to it, touched it. There's something about a woman's pregnant body that is sexy and powerful. It says, "I'm the mom. What's your claim to fame?"
Wednesday morning as I looked at my reflection in the mirror --- suddenly shapeless in a hospital gown --- all I could think was, "I wish I would have made the time to take a picture with Josh and my pregnant self." Silly, I know ... but true.
I actually took the gown back off and just stared at my belly for a few minutes. Maybe we'll have more kids & maybe we won't. But on the chance that this is it for us, I wanted to remember the belly. I think I got lost in it for a minute because somewhere in my daydreaming I got caught offgaurd by a little foot that kicked my ribs and sent a wave across my abdomen. "Hi mommy! I'm ready to come see you now!"
I had gotten used to those kicks and turns and jabs. But, in my sentimental state of mind I realized I had been selfish with those movements. Yea, I had shared them with Josh in the moments before we fell asleep each night. But I had never taken the time to sit with Ike and let him see his sister roll around. I had never taken the time to hold his hands over the places she often kicked. I'm sure he couldn't care less & this error in my judegment won't be the one he spends thousands of dollars on therapy on in his adult years .... but it still makes my heart ache a bit. Maybe more for me than for him --- it seems like a precious memory I would like to have made with him.
But ... it was too late to fix it. I really only mention it here as advice to any of you who may find yourself in similar situations. When you're pregnamt --- take the time to share the special moments with your loved ones. And don't be afraid to document it all in the form of pictures. Will people think you're cheesy and sentimental? Probably --- but who cares? You'll be glad you did it all. :)
Anyhoooo ... back to being excited. I shook it off and got on with the day. It went like this:
Pitocin @ 9 a.m.
Water broke @ noon.
Epidural @ 1.
Baby at 5:07.
Delivery was painless & quick. And she is amazing.
Here are the highlights in photos:
Waiting for the pitocin to start working ...
Jessie gave me a pedicure. Yay.
Grammie Pam showers us with gifts. <3
Puzzles & games.
Love this boy.
Correction: I love THESE boys. <3
Wallace, Ike & Pam.
Welcome to the world Anna-Kate:
Daddy cuts the cord.
"Hello sweet girl. Nice to meet you."
I'm in love.
Big brother watching them clean her up & check her out.
Daddy has the calming touch.
Aunt Tammy giving me the ol' 'Good job, mom!"
All cleaned up & ready for mama.
"Eat up, buttercup."
Isaac & Anna-Kate
Our little family.
Daddy & his girl.
Nana & Anna. <3
Aunt Carrie lovin' on our girl.
Grammie Pam inteoduces AK to Kari & Danielle.
Anna-Kate meets her BFF! <3
Ali & Anna.
Tandi meeting AK.
Portia, Zoe & their new cousin.
Anna-Kate came into the world on March 23, 2011 @ 5:07 pm weighing 7 lbs 5 oz. She was 19 inches long & beautiful. We're all in love.
We leave the hospital tomorrow morning. It's been nice to have a couple days to regroup ... but Isaac isn't allowed to spend the night here. I'm excited to get home where all four of us can be together.
Today is a weird day for me ... there's all this love floating around & so many reasons to be thankful. But today marks an awkward milestone for me. I'm tempted to talk about it now ....but I think I'll wait until tomorrow night when I'm home and have had a minute or two to process the strange transition that will take place sometime between the time I fall asleep tonight & the time I wake up tomorrow.
For now, Im going to catch a few Zzz's. Because, seriously, after seeing this ... :
... how could you not want to go snuggle in with them?